Child Custody Question

by Jason Deines

in Questions & Answers

Submitted by Mike

Long Story, after 18 yrs of marriage and 4 wonderful kids from 6 to 16 – my wife asked for a divorce. I have accepted my role in it and I have spent the last year totally devoted to my kiddos and making the best out of a bad situation. I have taken the high road on all matter to a point where my kids are feeling that i am being used….My ex has been a dating machine and has talk to our kids about moving out of state at times to be with THE ONE…In which there has been several of THE ONES for me. I have since met someone that has taken my heart and my children’s. She also has 4 kiddos roughly the same age and we are the Brady Bunch together. We all enjoy the same things and also being very open and honest with all the ups and downs. The concern is that she is in the military and lives 2 hrs away. She and I have talked about marriage. She has such a stable and loving home environment that all my kids want to be there. They have seen there mother at her worst and we are all tired of it…The problem is she the( ex )said our oldest two can go but the two youngest has to stay…We have joint custody and it was in our divorce that the children can live with what ever parent they choose….I do not know what to do. It was ok for her when she had intent to move. I do not want to be away from any of them. I can not financially afford a court battle. I would appreciate any help and advice. i would also be willing to share my Phone # with any one they could talk if they have had a similar situation.


{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Jason

I had a similar situation with my ex and dating. One day she said she was moving away with her most recent and wanted to take our daughter. I can’t describe the fear, anguish, and hate I felt at that instant. Plainly put that would happen over my dead body so I borrowed the money, got a lawyer, and now have full custody. Granted there are other issues for me having custody but the point is the children need to come first. They are too young to choose and can be manipulated. As a parent we need to provide a loving, stable, and safe environment. Fathers are beginning to pull some weight in the courts these days. It comes down to our motives. Is it for the children or is it out of spite or greed? Again the children must always come first. Are you sure you don’t have anything in the paperwork about moving out of state with the kids? There usually is some form of clause in there.

Try to show your ex why it would be better for the kids to stay where they are: school, friends, family, etc. Present a visitation schedule you think she will buy off on. This is one of the main reasons divorce stinks… and sometimes there is no winning. Just be the best dad you can and pray.

There are a bunch of resources that may help you. Click Here

2 Kat

Jason is right. Take a good look at your paperwork. You may have something about moving the children out of state.

Praying for you

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