When Do You Stop Hoping for Reconciliation

by Jason Deines

in Questions & Answers

Submitted by Lianna

When do you stop hoping for reconciliation?

My husband has left and is now living with another woman. My heart is broken. I’ve been praying for a reconciliation but how do I know when to stop praying for one?

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Jason

For me it was when the divorce was finalized. At that point I wanted closure and to move on with my life, so I did. Now that I look back I am not certain that I would have been able to accept my wife back after being unfaithful and I think that is a question you need to ask yourself. Do you really want him back after living with another woman? I would also look at how much time has passed. If it has been a couple weeks, keep on hoping but if it has been several months it may be time to let go. However, no matter what the situation I think you should change your focus to what God wants for you and try not to worry about reconciliation. Find a new prayer to pray and let go; if it is meant to be God will bring things around.

2 Donald

We are 30 days away from the 12 month separation point. I’m going through the reality that this is really going to happen, we had separated two years ago and spent approx. 10 months apart and out of the blue she wnated to reconcile. 6 months later, she was back to her bad moods and questioning the reconcilation. I had changed in HUGE ways and was tracking toward even more dramatic changes which I am truly proud of. But she does not feel any need to change and due to that she has not moved or stepped out to alter any part of her attitude. She culd be happy if she allowed herself but to date – fat chance.
It’s a shame and I hate the things I did that contributed to this mess, I’d love for us to try but she has no desire to se anything but negative/bad,and only the negative /bad in me (or that was in me) and absolutley nothing in her life. Wish I could really stop feeling this was for her and just let her go.

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