Don't Just Survive, Learn to Thrive after Divorce

Don’t Just Survive, Learn to Thrive after Divorce

by Jason Deines

in Featured, Tips for Coping with Divorce

Going through a divorce is a humbling and difficult process with negative consequences and emotions. Often, people get stuck or wrapped up in the negativity they forget to resume and rebuild their lives. We are all stuck somewhere, the trick is to recognize it and choose to move on.

In the initial stages of divorce we all hope for God to step in and save the marriage, giving us another chance. We pray, hope and plead – building expectations that we are going to beat the odds or that God will work a miracle only to come to realize that the marriage is over and there is nothing that we can do. We find ourselves helpless, hopeless and depressed. I am not saying that all marriages that start down the road of divorce are destined to end and you should just give up but statistically over half of all marriages end in divorce and you need to be prepared.

It is easy to fall in a state of depression and feel sorry for ourselves, thinking that life will be unlivable without our partner. Or we fill our hearts with anger and bitterness and destroy every other relationship around us. When we stop living a Purpose Driven Life we end up in a state of survival; understandably that may be where we need to be for a short period but it should not become the norm. Why simply survive when you can thrive and enjoy life again? There is a time and place to feel sorry for yourself but at some point you need to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, take a hard look at your life and determine which path you wish to pursue. Are you going to continue as you are or are you going to start heading for that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow?

God did not create us to be alone and when you are ready to rebuild your life after divorce you don’t have to do it alone. Rely on close friends, church pastors, support groups, family members and Christian counselors. There are many options available to you to find joy and healing in your life.

Put the anger, pity, guilt, pride or whatever is holding you back away and let God heal your life. Stop living in the past and look towards the future, look forward for what tomorrow holds and remember that each day you should be healing and growing. It is time to discover that the gold at the end of the rainbow is you!


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1 Father_of_2

This article could not have come at a better time. The key, I believe, is first of all to be free from the bondage of grief and bitterness. I was in a place where I constantly accused others of being bitter towards me, but it was I who contained the bitterness and a bit of hatred. So, I decided to physically write down a list of items that were causing bitterness in my life, I went out into my backyard, gave them to God, asked for forgiveness for allowing these strongholds to take over my life, burned the paper, and I CANNOT tell you in words the freedom and release that accompanied that. Now…to find a new church and get involved again after being out for a year and a half. Prayers are always welcome!!

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