I am Confused!

by Jason Deines

in Questions & Answers

Submitted by Martha

Iam a christian and got divorce in january this year. I found out my husband is gay(bisexual) about 4 years ago. It has bn a tough ride . Been to many prayer sessions but he never accepted something is wrong. Unrtil I decided I had enoigh and called for the divorce. My marriage was about 7 years in January. Life after divorce hasn’t been easy either. Hard part is telling family and friends, work mates and church members. My son is only 3 so I still have a tough assignment to do. Loneliness is another set back for me. Especially weekends. I try to keep my self busy but in the evening it still comes back. Reading your blog today seems it will be very helpful. My question is.. I recently bn following a column in our weekly newspaper in which the writer says there is no acceptable reason for divorce. No matter wat divorce is not an option. Is this real ? Am now trying to question myself did I do a right thing. But certainly my marriage was built on a lie and this guy has bn committing adultery. Isn’t thing enough reason for divorce. Should I have stayed on in a loveless marriage while my husband is sleeping with men. Iam just confused.

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Jason

Martha, we are all confused sometimes but don’t fret. Adultery is valid grounds for divorce in God’s eyes so don’t worry about what anyone else says.

Matthew 5:32
But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.

Also don’t spend a lot of time second guessing yourself. The more we look back and worry about the past the harder the future becomes. If you make a mistake, as we all do, ask forgiveness, learn and do better the next time around. I wouldn’t worry about sharing your husband’s transgressions with everyone either. It really isn’t their business and that way you don’t need to worry about what they will think. You don’t need to justify your choice to anyone.

2 Donna

Hi beautiful Martha,

I am so sad to hear about your husband falling into this sin. I have to agree with the previous post. You were within grounds to divorce your husband, especially if he is sleeping with other men! I think God wants us to pray for our spouses and never give up. The devil is our enemy and he has attacked your husband and deceived him. I suggest checking out rejoice ministries and also blazing grace ministries. It helped me to make sense of a lot of things. Pray for your ex husband and forgive him, but you were within biblical grounds to divorce him. God bless you

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