In most instances when two people go through a divorce they will be faced with confusion and agonizing feelings. Divorce is hard enough, and there is no need to make things worse for yourself or family. Dealing with the loss and emptiness often drives people to slip into many behaviors that can be self-destructive. Here are five pitfalls to avoid while going through a divorce.
- Don’t become a workaholic.
- Avoid alcohol and drugs.
- Avoid other addictions.
- Avoid starting a new romantic relationship.
- Avoid blaming and bitterness.
When it comes to getting on with your life after divorce, you want to be able to grow and heal from experience. By engaging in many of the above behaviors, you will only prolong that process and in some instances never heal at all and be destined to repeat over and over again destructive behaviors that will condemn future relationships.
Some habits and addictions are hard to break, and I watched my ex-turn to alcohol, blaming, and other relationships to deal with her choice to divorce. For me, I have taken it upon myself to find a better way, a more healthy way to deal with the divorce. Living in a fog bouncing from relationship to relationship doesn’t help a person to heal nor is it anyway to raise a child. You need a clear mind and a drive to look within and dig out those things that are harmful to relationships that are important to you. It is amazing that up to 70% of second marriages will end in divorce. Why? Because people don’t take the time to deal with the baggage from previous relationships before entering a new one. Do you want to have to go through a divorce all over again? I know I don’t and I will do everything in my power to prevent it from happening to me again.
Finding fault in others is easy but to honestly take a self-inventory and address the real issues in your life before moving on will enhance the quality of your life and the people you choose to be with. So take the time to heal, take the time to grow, and just take time to better understand who you are.