It is no secret that relationships can be difficult. There is always a degree of anticipation, uncertainty, excitement, hope, and fear that muddies the water when starting to date after divorce. Often people wonder if they will be able to love again or if anyone will ever love them again. Divorce has a way of building walls around a person’s heart, lowering self-esteem, and robbing a person of hope for the future. Many people take on the opinion that they will never marry again because the divorce hurt so badly.
Obviously, there are some critical milestones to reach before dating after divorce. Even though you know that God loves you and that you have friends and family that love you, it can be hard to think that someone will ever be interested in you romantically. If we aren’t careful, we can take on the “damaged goods” label and sabotage every potential relationship set before us.
Before even opening the door to the dating scene it is important that you have worked on healing and that you love yourself. Divorce tends to rob a person of their self-worth, and that needs to be corrected before moving into another relationship. I have often read that we attract people that have similar emotional health as we do. The last thing we want to do is attract someone that thinks they need to fix or rescue us. You can avoid much of this by having confidence in yourself, loving yourself and accepting yourself for who you are.
There are several ways you can improve your self-esteem; I used prayer, positive self-talk, affirmations, goal setting, visualization, learning and physical exercise to achieve where I am at today. I am far from perfect, but I am not the man I was 3 years ago.
So will anyone ever love you again? The answer is “yes,” but first you need to love yourself. Know what you want in a partner, have a positive outlook on life, make some new friends, have fun, don’t over analyze, be confident and by all means don’t ever settle for something you know isn’t meant to be because you fear to be alone.